Can You Wrestle With Your Critique Group?

I think I have one of the world's greatest critique partners.  She is reliable and she is relentless.  We've been part of the same weekly writing group for several years now.  The members have changed, but the two of us have stayed consistent and kept it going.  We have really different, complementary styles.  But the best thing about her is that I can argue and wrestle with her and she laughs and forgives me.

Now, I realize I shouldn't abuse this privilege.  I have no patience for people who can't handle feedback.  Why be in a critique group if you're not willing to be critiqued?  However, I've discovered something about myself.  I learn by wrestling through things.  I learn by arguing, discussing, disagreeing.

I don't get biblical on this blog too often, but I'm about to do it now.  You've been fairly warned.  There's a passage in the Bible where Jacob wrestles with an angel.  It's where the name Israel comes from and it means "he who wrestles with God."  I LOVE this story, because it absolutely contradicts the notion of blind obedience.  In fact, Jacob goes at it with the Lord Almighty, wins the match, and gets a blessing for it.    

My teacher self has another example.  The latest brain research shows that you build more neural connections from working on a difficult problem, whether you get the right answer or not, than from solving a problem you already know.  In fact, kids who struggled and wrestled and were taught the value of that PROCESS actually did better on post-assessments than students who were simply told how smart they were.  I have a feeling I'm not doing this particular bit of info justice, but the summary is - when you struggle to understand something, your brain grows.

So, back to my critique group.  As much as I fear I may drive poor Suzanne crazy with my questions and responses and arguments, I am so tremendously grateful that she doesn't write me off and let annoyance get the better of her because the process of wrestling with her is making my work better and me better as a writer.  And that is a blessing.

What battles and struggles have you found valuable?  Who are your favorite folks for a good intellectual wrestling match?

Fearless Revision

"What if I rewrite the whole thing in first person?"
"What if I cut this chapter entirely?"
"What if death is the narrator?"
"What if there are 4 different narrators?"
"What if I write it as a blog?"
"What if she turns into a hippo instead of a moose?"

There was a time when I revised like an ancient, nearsighted clockmaker, turning over every word and phrase, tinkering with the minutest mechanism, making miserly revisions as if each change cost me and each letter was crafted from grains of diamond dust. I love treating words with so much affection and care, but I'm thankful that I have finally developed the courage to make more fearless revisions, skydiving, bungee-jumping revisions, the kind of revisions that change the entire landscape of a manuscript.

My whole critique group seems to have entered this phase of development together, which makes it ten times more exhilarating. When one of us announces, "I think I'm going to cut that whole section and move the important parts here instead," we cheer, we exult. It feels like we've all gone cliff-diving together.

Perhaps the support and safety of this long-term critique group has given me the foundation of confidence to take those plot-shattering leaps. Or maybe this liberation comes with writing novel-length pieces. Perhaps it's a function of exposing myself, over a period of time, to multiple critiques. Or maybe being in the habit of writing has made the words less scarce and therefore less precious, the process less like mining gold and more like cultivating a garden.

What is the most fearless, radical change you've ever made in a piece of your own writing? How did it affect the story?

If you've found yourself saying, "What if I ....?" or "I wonder what would happen if ...." then I challenge you to grab the hands of some fellow writers and take that vigorous plunge! What have you got to lose?